Business Writing and Presentations
    Wed., Sep. 4-Dec. 11, 2019
    6:25-9 p.m. ET
    New York University
    (graduate course)

    Presentation Skills for Introverts®
    Thu., Mar. 26 & Apr. 2, 2020
    6-8:55 p.m. ET
    New York University
    (2-session workshop)


    How to "Talk the Talk" at Professional Events (free)
    Columbia University Alumni Career Services

    How to Think on Your Feet: Improv Skills for Business
    Co-facilitators: Nancy Ancowitz and Carl Kissin
    American Management Association

    How to Deliver Powerful Presentations as an Introvert
    American Management Association

    Essential Management Skills for Introverts
    American Management Association

    How to Project Confidence with Demanding People
    American Management Association

    Secrets of Successful Public Speaking
    American Management Association


    Tango for Leaders
    For organizations

    Success Strategies for Introvert Leaders
    National Institutes of Health
    (Workshop for NIH employees only)

    Publisher's Weekly
    "Best Books"
    The New York Times
    "Currently winning our race for most intriguing book title of 2009 is the oxymoronic “Self-Promotion for Introverts” by Nancy Ancowitz (McGraw Hill). The 'how to' book is filled with tips (rehearse is a favorite). The author’s tone is supportive and she does not argue that introverts should become live wires. But what else would you expect from a book whose subtitle is 'the quiet guide to getting ahead'?"
    The Wall Street Journal
    "…showing how quiet people can turn their innate strengths into an advantage when networking."
    ABC News
    "Best Book Gifts"
    Los Angeles Times
    "Whatever's behind your reluctance to speak out for yourself, this is the first book I've seen with serious research on the topic that leads to a new game plan."
    CIO Insight
    "Must-Read Fall Books for IT Execs"
    "Best New Career Books"
    "Offers a solid dose of practical advice—alongside humorous anecdotes.... Ancowitz shows introverts how to take advantage of the unique qualities and strengths they can offer."
    The Independent Consultant
    "There is great value in this book, whether you are promoting your own business or consulting practice, or just want to be sure your talents are recognized within your larger organization."
    Small Business Trends
    "Written by an introvert for introverts."
    Ft. Myers Florida Weekly
    "'Self-Promotion for Introverts' is a primer on doing just that—helping 'quiet sorts' assert themselves by using their inherent tendencies in the most effective ways."
    Women and Leadership Australia
    "Pitched perfectly. Our rating: 10/10."

Conquering the Introvert-Extrovert Communication Gap, Part 2

I recently shared what every introvert needs to know to communicate well with extroverts*. Now let’s look at the other side of the coin, from my book, Self-Promotion for Introverts®: The Quiet Guide to Getting Ahead:

How extroverts can communicate well with introverts

  • Welcome introverts to state our opinions, but avoid putting us on the spot. Distribute an agenda and ask for our input privately, by e-mail, prior to a meeting to give us time to compose our thoughts.
  • Avoid asking introverts questions that we may experience as too personal or invasive; be patient with our need to get to know you over time.
  • Limit chitchat to the beginning of a conversation, and get to the more substantive parts more quickly.
  • Just as you may have a breadth of knowledge on many topics, appreciate introverts for our depth of knowledge about a few topics.
  • Make appointments with introverts rather than dropping by unannounced.
  • Respect introverts’ need for private space. Do not stand too close during a conversation or reach into our space.
  • Remember that what you find stimulating (e.g., multitasking) may be overwhelming for introverts; many of us need to quietly focus on one thing at a time.
  • Consider meeting with your introverted colleagues in a quiet space to help ensure minimal interruptions. Do something more social before and after the meeting if you need more people time.
  • Give introverts time alone to do our best thinking and allow for sufficient breaks during meetings.
  • Recognize that introverts tend to undersell our accomplishments and potential contributions.
  • Let introverts finish speaking, count to three (to yourself!), and then speak; do not fill in the pauses.

For more stories about introverts and extroverts, see “5 Things Every Introvert Should Know About Extroverts (and Vice Versa)” and “Secrets to a Successful Introvert-Extrovert Team.”

Excerpt adapted from: Nancy Ancowitz, Self-Promotion for Introverts®: The Quiet Guide to Getting Ahead, McGraw-Hill, 2009, pp. 217-219.

*Also spelled “extraverts” by Carl Jung and the communities of the MBTI® and other personality assessments such as the Five Factor Model.

Correction: In an earlier version of this story, the headline that currently reads, “How extroverts can communicate well with introverts” inadvertently read, “How introverts can communicate well with extroverts.”

© Copyright 2010 Nancy Ancowitz

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